found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
