did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
