Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Randomize
