is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
