It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
