i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize