I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Randomize
