she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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