I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
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