She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
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