She is in my trunk
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
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