you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
