I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
