i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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