Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I smell like Dick and happiness
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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