dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
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