so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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