Is it normal to miss your booty call?
i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Randomize
