Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
