can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Randomize
