But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Randomize
