that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Your topless pictures make me question reality
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Randomize
