I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
