sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
