So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
please come you make the beer taste better
Life is so much better after having sex.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
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