biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Randomize
