Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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