i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
