i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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