just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
