Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
