As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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