your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
