So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
Randomize
