Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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