As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
