So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
