Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Randomize
