I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
