When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize