the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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