I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
