y did u give ur computer a hand job?
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
