their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
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