I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
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