Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
