Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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