I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Are my feet made of real feet?
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
