I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize
