She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
